


The Things You Have to Live With

by MagalaBee



Series: Ingrid Rarepair Week [2]
Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Black Eagles Ingrid Brandl Galatea, F/M, Fire Emblem: Three Houses Black Eagles Route, Guilt, Hurt/Comfort, Post-Timeskip | War Phase (Fire Emblem: Three Houses), Remorse, Survivor Guilt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-17
Updated: 2020-10-17
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:19:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27054802
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MagalaBee/pseuds/MagalaBee
Summary: After the battle of Gronder Field, Ingrid finds herself haunted by her own regrets. She sided with the empire, and Yuri is the only one in the imperial army who can understand the weight she carries.INGRID RAREPAIR WEEK DAY 2: Treason / Dreams
Relationships: Ingrid Brandl Galatea/Yuris Leclair | Yuri Leclerc, yurigrid
Series: Ingrid Rarepair Week [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1973008
Comments: 1
Kudos: 12





	The Things You Have to Live With

**Author's Note:**

> Ingrid Rarepair Week Day 2!!! This time, Yurigrid won the daily Twitter poll, so enjoy this bit of big feelings and regret.

Ingrid wandered at night now. She never used to have such an unhealthy habit. No matter how difficult life in Galatea got, as a child, she had always slept like a stone and risen early with the sun. Now, she was turning into an insomniac.

Her feet dragged slowly over chipped cobblestones and cracked walkways. The monastery used to be vibrant and full of life. Now, they were all one foot in the grave.

“What are you up to, sparrow?” Yuri asked. Ingrid hadn’t even noticed him, but it was hardly surprising that he was up at this hour. He had a way with coming out of the shadows.

“Can’t sleep,” Ingrid shrugged, avoiding his eyes. They were too sharp and even in the dark, she knew that he was wearing make up. She knew that he was beautiful. “What about you?”

“Oh, I make a habit of never sleeping,” he said flippantly, tossing the bit of sarcasm aside. “Hubert pays me not to.”

Ingrid’s brows pursed together. She looked down at the dark silhouette of her own feet. “...Is that why you joined up with Adrestia?” she asked quietly. “Just… for money?”

Yuri sighed and she listened to his shoes slowly click on the pavement before they were standing in front of her own. “Come now, sparrow. You know there’s more to it than that.”

Ingrid’s shoulders still tensed and she found herself shaking her head. “Is there? I can’t… I can’t remember why I’m here anymore, Yuri. What’s the point of all this hell?”

“We’re fighting for a better Fodlan. One where little girls like you won’t be sold off at bir--”

“What does it even matter?!” she snapped. Ingrid didn’t know why she yelled, but after so many nights of wandering Garreg Mach, she felt so empty. “What… What does any of it matter if we lose  _ everything _ just trying to get there?.”

“...Ingrid--” Yuri put a hand on her shoulder and, despite her better judgment, Ingrid looked him in the eyes. “You didn’t kill them.”

Immediately, she felt the tears stinging inside her. She could see their faces when she closed her eyes. She could hear their voices. They sounded like children in her memories, begging for her to come play another game before her father took her back home again--

Her voice cracked, “It feels like I did…”

As her tears overflowed, Yuri wrapped her in his arms. He pulled her close and rubbed wide circles against her back. Ingrid sobbed against him, a dam cracking open in her chest. The emptiness gave way and she felt herself flooded. Like she was drowning in the guilt. The boys she had known her entire life were nothing but ghosts now, and for a moment, Ingrid wished she could be one of them.

“Is th-this how Dimitri felt?” she keened.

“Don’t,” Yuri murmured, his arms squeezing her closer. Ingrid fit against him better than she thought she would. It was so much easier to put her head against his shoulder than it should have been. When he turned his head and kissed her hair, it actually made her body feel less heavy. Like he was trying to pull her out of a lake, and might actually be able to get her to swim again.

“You didn’t kill them,” Yuri repeated, more firmly this time. “We can’t look back for their ghosts.”

“...You’re from Faerghus too… aren’t you?” Ingrid asked, sniffling and trying to catch her breath.

“I am,” Yuri whispered. 

“How… how are we supposed to live with what we’ve done?” she asked. “Gronder was treason…”

Yuri hesitated. He usually had an answer for everything, but this time, he was quiet. But his hands didn’t move. One still making circles on her back, like silent, repeated prayer, and the other holding around her waist. He sighed into her hair. 

“Come on, sparrow…” Yuri offered, changing the subject that neither of them could really answer. “You need to sleep. Let me help.”

“...Alright,” Ingrid whispered, nodding her head on his shoulder. “Y… You’re right.”

They both knew that there would never be a way they could answer all of their regrets.


End file.
